Special Send-offs is based on Newlands Park Drive in Scarborough and has been established since 2017.
We have several ‘firsts’ in Scarborough which we are really proud of. These involve holding highly personalized funerals at venues other than the crematorium. These have been the Beach, Hackness Grange Island and now Stepney Barn.
Lauren, Tom’s partner, approached me asking about a service for Tom. Tom had discussed what he didn’t want, which was a service at the crematorium, he wanted something more ‘him’, more colorful, more of a celebration of his life. Lauren knew I had a green VW Transporter hearse and it seemed just right.
Lauren looked at a couple of places and settled on Stepney Farm barn as it was big enough to hold the large number of people and everyone could stay after the service for food and drinks in a traditional ‘wake’ style.
Stepney also has a lovely open wood fire in the middle of the building which is very welcome in winter.
Tom was 39 when he died. He had really been through it. I won’t list his full catalogue of traumas and events that he had to endure but he had a serious heart issue and needed a transplant. He eventually had the transplant but unfortunately it was too late.
I have to say that his partner Lauren was just amazing throughout, in fact the whole family and everyone I met were just so lovely despite going through such terrible grief.
Stepney Farm is essentially a working farm but the barn has been converted into a lovely venue that is used for weddings, parties… and now funerals.
We had an 11:00 service start time planned. The whole service was family led with tributes from friends and family. Myles was a really close friend of Tom’s and he led the tributes. He did a fabulous job. The best and worst tributes I have seen have been when family and friends lead the service. Myles, Lauren and co. was one of the best I have been privileged to see & hear.
More and more people arrived and by 11:00am there was 250+ people in place ready for the service to start.
I’m not going list the service events in detail. You had to be there. It’s a cliché to say that it was a privilege to be allowed to support and help arrange a service like this but it truly was.
Leaving the barn with Tom was a powerful, moving moment that I will never forget, and I didn’t even know him! 200+ people lined the route out to the VW ‘Final Transporter’.
Tom’s service took love, work and dedication to making it a true celebration of a much loved and popular man. It was way more representative of the person that Tom was and how his friends and family wanted to remember him.
This about 500 words. Pictures can say a 1000 words.. better than mine too.
